Waste not Want not

As many of you already know, I have worked hard this year to stock our freezer with venison. Unfortunately I have not been as quick at this as I have in other years. This year it has just plain been hard work. We do have 3 deer in the freezer, and I do have another bow tag (good until the 10th) and 2 (doe only) rifle tags for next week (the 11th - 25th) but I haven't had time lately to be in the stand.
I have had time to work however, so this morning found me headed home from the fire station. As I was driving down a gravel road, about six miles from home, I suddenly saw a flash of brown on the passenger side of my truck and heard a terrific crash. I glanced quickly in my rear view mirror to see a doe thrashing in the middle of the road. I pulled over to the side of the road and continued to watch for about 45 seconds as she breathed her last and lay still.

A quick assessment of my truck showed that my passenger door was dented in (but still operable), my passenger mirror was missing, and the side of my truck was banged up in front and behind my rear tire.
If you read the title to this post, you can imagine what I did next. I backed my truck up the road until it was just in front of the deer. Then I got out and dropped my tailgate so that I could throw her in the bed. As I looked at her I was thinking through the things that I needed to do in order to salvage as much meat as possible. There didn't appear to be any hide missing so the meat should still be clean. Unfortunately I did not have a knife with me so I was going to have to load her without field dressing her first. I knew that this was going to make her very difficult to load.

As I looked at her lying there with her tongue hanging out and blood running into the gravel dust, I decided to call a friend of mine that had left work shortly after I had. I knew that he should be passing within just a few miles of my accident and I thought that he would be a great help in loading the limp carcass into my truck. I picked up my phone and gave him a call. It sounded something like this...

Hello!

Kurt, it's Jon. Where are you?

I just left Menards, I had to pick something up on my way home. Why?

Are you headed home now?

Yes, why?

Well, I just hit a deer after the road turns to gravel. I have my truck backed up to her but I don't have anything to gut her with. I was wondering if you could stop by and hel - Oh my! Uh-oh... oh ma...

(I should take a minute to explain that at this point I was standing behind the deer idly kicking my foot at her rump. This nudge was apparently all she needed. {CPR must work differently on deer than on people} She raised her head, looked at me wide-eyed and then scrambled to her feet)

Uh, Kurt, she just got up but she's a little wobbly. There is blood all over the ground but she's standing in the middle of the road looking at me. I don't have anything with me that will put her down, do you?

I've got my bow, I'll be righ - wha -oh man- oh... click

(I should take a minute to explain that at this point Kurt had just completed an illegal U-turn and found himself rear ended by a 16 year old boy that was headed to school)

Kurt... Kurt... Kurt?


Five minutes later he answered his phone. He told me of his misfortune and I told him that my dead deer had walked off and hidden in a CRP field.

Between you and I, deer are a nuisance. Deer have been involved in countless vehicle accidents over the years. Insurance companies spend millions due to these collisions. What will they think when they find out that one deer caused two accidents six miles apart?